My Unfamiliar Family

 My Unfamiliar Family

7.5/10

My Unfamiliar Family

Genre:                                     Episodes: 16                         Year: 2020

Melodrama

Synopsis:

Kim Eun Hee is the middle child in a family that is starting to drift apart. Her older sister is a former attorney, and her younger brother still lives at home. Her father is often distant, which has left her mother wanting to separate and live on her own.

Cast:

Han Ye Ri (Kim Eun Hee)

Choo Ja Hyun (Kim Eun Joo)

Kim Ji Suk (Park Chan Hyuk)

Shin Jae Ha (Kim Ji Woo)

Jung Jin Young (Kim Sang Shik)

Won Mi Kyung (Lee Jin Sook)

Kim Tae Hoon (Yoon Tae Hyung)

Shin Dong Wook (Im Gun Joo)

General Thoughts: This is an interesting and mostly enjoyable little show. It’s an odd mix of slice-of-life and makjang, with the birth secrets and crazy plot-twists presented in such a natural, normal way that they felt very much like a part of real life.

I don't think I've ever seen a realistic makjang before

While the situations occurring in the show were often highly dramatic, it was the very realistic characters that helped ground the drama and make it feel like something inherently relatable- even though most of us have probably not had issues with secret second families or closeted husbands. The pacing of the show was a bit on the slow side, but the drama itself never felt slow. Rather than feeling draggy, it was more like the writers gave the issues presented in the show time to breathe, and gave all our characters ample time to react and respond.

Slow but not boring

Because our characters’ thoughts were always presented in a clear and concise way, we never felt cut-off from how they were responding to each situation- even if there response was to stay silent and act as normal, us viewers still knew that this was a calculated and deliberate action on our characters’ part, which negated feeling like our characters were doing nothing and were wasting time. Even though the events of the show were a bit whack, such as the Dad losing his memories and reverting back to his 22 year old self, the storytelling felt thoughtful and introspective, and used these situations as tools to help us understand our characters, their thoughts, their motivations, and their relationships. I think it’s a great testament to the writer that they were able to develop these kinds of detailed, layered characters and present them to the audience in such an understandable way- I was never really truly baffled by a characters actions in this show, which is an amazing thing in and of itself. I disagreed with certain characters’ actions and how they handled situations- I even thought their actions totally stupid on occasion, but I never wondered why the character chose to act that way. As for the plot, I’m glad that the show threw in extra issues right away, because to be honest, I didn’t really care about whether Mum and Dad ‘graduated’ from their marriage or not.

22 year old Dad was kinda fun though

Perhaps it’s because I’m still young(ish) and not a parent, but I just found the younger characters more engaging, relatable, and just straight up more likeable. I warmed up to the parents once they entered their sort of dating phase, as it was cute and they seemed to be making more of an effort, but then they lost me again a bit at the end. The kids however, were always interesting to watch, and had much more engaging (in my opinion) dilemmas to navigate.

Great character, great acting- perfect combo

The casting was absolutely spot on. Han Ye Ri is amazing and I’ve loved her in everything I’ve seen her in. She gives her characters such heart, and always delivers an astoundingly natural performance- she never over or under acts, and you never feel like her own characteristics are pushing through the character. She just IS whoever she is portraying. And that was certainly the case here- Han Ye Ri just WAS Eun Hee. I cannot imagine another actress playing Eun Hee. She filled her with so much charm and an endearing level of goofiness- the character absolutely sparkled with Han Ye Ri’s performance behind her. She has a natural and comfortable chemistry with Kim Ji Suk, and they made for one delightful couple. The two had a good rapport, and their silly, friendly banter seemed so, so natural and not at all scripted. Kim Ji Suk himself gave a dazzling performance as the Kim Family Secret Keeper. Choo Ja Hyun was another absolute standout in the cast. At first I thought Eun Joo was going to be a difficult character to like. She was icy and appeared unsupportive of her family. However, as the story progressed and we got to know more about Eun Joo and her relationships, she became a character that was easy to root for. I adore that Eun Joo who was a strong, capable woman who didn’t mince her words was presented as a ‘good’ character- so often characters with those traits and straightforward personalities are delegated to ‘snarky second female lead’ roles, while characters more similar to Eun Hee (bright, bubbly, considerate) are delegated as the loveable leads.

She's an ice queen and I love it

Eun Joo must have been a hard character to portray, as she never really voiced her emotions that often. Instead Choo Ja Hyun had to rely on tiny facial changes or slight shifts in body language to emote Eun Joo’s reactions and thought processes. And she did this wonderfully. It helped that Eun Hee was also relearning about how to read Eun Joo after their falling out, as it felt like she was learning about Eun Joo at the same pace us viewers were. Having Eun Hee as a guide on how to interpret Eun Joo’s responses was helpful, and Choo Ja Hyun just did such a beautiful job giving us a multifaceted character for us to love.

And I am 100% onboard with the hinted romance between Eun Joo and Male Eun Hee

The relationships the two girls had with their partners were also super interesting to watch develop. While Eun Joo's marriage was breaking down, her and Tae Hyung actually opened up their communication styles and explored so much about each other and how their relationship had fallen apart (you know, beyond Tae Hyung not liking women).

What a crummy situation for them both

It was so heartbreaking to watch them both struggle, but it was the hurt they needed to get through in order to begin to heal. They had both hurt each other so much through the course of their marriage, and it was so fascinating to watch how they came full circle with each other- still having a lot of love and affection for the other, but having to sort through all the anger and resentment to realise what they were doing to each other. Eun Hee's relationship was a bit more simple and sweet, but it was no less engaging to watch play out on screen. The two circled each other for a long time, slowly building back the friendship that they had lost after their falling out. It was a big step for each of them to make forward, as risking their friendship was a massive gamble. They were slow and uncertain, but they slowly and surely made gradual steps towards each other, building trust as they went. While their interactions were mostly easy and fun, there was enough tension between the two of them that it remained engaging to watch. With a lot of pretty serious drama going on in Eun Hee's family, the show really needed a lighter aspect to it, and Eun Hee and Chan Hyuk's blossoming romance was definitely the sweetness the show needed to balance out all the heavy emotions pouring out of the other family members.

Every drama needs an adorable love-line

While I didn’t particularly like the parents all that much, Jung Jin Young and Won Mi Kyung did a brilliant job as the Mum and Dad of our central family. Jung Jin Young particularly did fantastically when his character reverted back to his 22 year old self. There was a dramatic difference in the way he held his face, so free of tension, that it was so easy to know which mindset the character was in. Even as Sang Shik lied and told Jin Sook that he had regained his memories, as the audience it was easy to tell that this wasn’t necessarily the case.

Kinda a shame he needed amnesia to force him into being a good Dad

Sang Shik’s scowl had been such a ingrained part of his character, that when this was lifted by his memory loss, it really opened up Jung Jin Young’s face, and was an excellent way to show the viewers that something about the character had changed. Similarly, even when Sang Shik’s memories returned, Jung Jin Young’s expression changed back to being more of his original scowl, but with an added sadness and slight openness to his features that suggested he had learned much during his memory regression that changed the way he viewed his wife and his memories of their time together. Won Mi Kyung also did a great job as Sang Shik’s wife. As her character was also similarly introspective rather than dialogue driven, she had to do much of her communication through her expressions. Small eyebrow movements and the tension in her mouth clued us into what her character was thinking and feeling, and never left us in the dark about what was going through her character’s mind. Wrapping up our family was Shin Jae Ha- he does a great job at acting the loveable, slightly goofy youngest child, but his character wasn’t given as much emotional heavy lifting as I was hoping for. I know Shin Jae Ha can really deliver on emotions, so it was a bit of a bummer when he was essentially relegated to a side character.

Was still a cute maknae though

The production of this drama was done really well, with shots that lingered to really draw out the emotions in each of the scenes. It allowed the characters room to breathe and react appropriately, rather than forcing a quick break down and then moving onto the next scene. The dialogue between the characters was also excellent- usually I find characters tend to overshare their thoughts,

And Chan Hyuk was such an adorably good friend to everyone

as we can’t read their thoughts so can only gain insight into their character through what they say and do. In this case though, I thought the characters hit that perfect balance of expressing themselves to other characters, but also holding back- they didn’t just say whatever was on their mind at the time. It actually did wonders for developing the characters, as not only did we gain information on them through what they said, but also what they didn’t say. While Eun Joo acted tough and indifferent, she would often keep her struggles to herself choosing not to burden her husband or her family with her issues. While she stated that she didn’t want to be a part of the family, by her holding back it showed how much she actually treasured her family- she didn’t want them to have to deal with anything extra if she could prevent it, and still remained protective of her younger siblings. By having her open up towards the end and lean more on Eun Hee for support, we could really see her relationship with her sister improving- because there was more dialogue, there was more trust. Lastly, I think the soundtrack was really pleasant. It wasn’t too in your face, and supported the rest of the show nicely.

What Was Great:

Sisters:

Despite the title implying that this drama was about a whole family (which to be honest it was), the main development really happened between the two sisters- both individually and the relationship between them. A lot of the show really focused on the two women coming to understand more about each other.

They were really complete opposites

While previously they were hyper aware of each other's flaws and had hurt each other badly in the past, in the duration of the show they both came to understand more about each others strengths- even as those strengths were so closely tied to their flaws. Eun Joo appeared hard and cold, and her ambivalent attitude towards Eun Hee had really hurt her in the past. However as their relationship starts to grow again, Eun Hee realises that what she needs when she is feeling defeated and down is not pity or sympathy, but Eun Joo’s calm, rational and factual insight that the issue isn’t the end of the world and that Eun Hee will bounce back.

Two thumbs up for sister love

Eun Hee acknowledges that Eun Joo is not incorrect in her assessment of her shortcomings, and while it hurts to hear, Eun Hee then starts to learn more about herself and gains the strength to do things she might not ordinarily have been able to do. Similarly, while Eun Joo previously thought of Eun Hee as frivolous and unsubstantial in her relationships, as they grow closer it’s that exact warmth and endlessly forgiving nature of Eun Hee's that becomes such a great support for Eun Joo as she is going through such a difficult time. Eun Joo learned so much about herself and her relationship with her husband throughout the show, and it was wonderful to gain insight into her character. She really was such a unique character to have on screen, and so unlike the K-Drama heroines we are usually given. It was a delight to be taken on her journey and see how she grew, but also to see how she had always been the protector of her family. New challenges that revealed more about Eun Joo’s character also provided insight into her actions in the past, and helped us understand how she viewed the world. Eun Hee, on the other hand, was a much more typical K-Drama heroine type character. She was bright and bubbly and friendly- but even the drama managed to flip that on its head. Rather than having Eun Hee just be a simple character that was easy to like, the drama really delved into showing how Eun Hee constructed this persona.

An extra two thumbs up for amazing character growth

Due to her family and her situation she became the sunny child in order to be the foil to her icy sister- she used this bright personality as a shield and also as a way to try and gain the love she so desperately craved- from her family, from her colleagues, and from her romantic partners. I adored that the show really explored these aspects of Eun Hee’s character and made her so much more thann a cookie cutter ‘nice’ heroine. 

What Wasn’t:

Mum and Dad:

While they were pivotal to the story and a lot of the different characters’ developments, I just didn’t like Sang Shik and Jin Sook. I could understand their though processes and their motivations, but I just found them so inherently irritating. The show’s focus on the parents was a nice change of pace, as K-Dramas are usually centred on characters in their 20s and 30s, but I really struggled to connect emotionally to these two.

I cared about their story, but less so for the actual characters themselves

Perhaps it was because so much was held back from them in order to create mystery and intrigue (was Sang Shik cheating, what had made Jin Sook want to separate), but I just couldn’t find myself liking them. Weak isn’t really the word I’m looking for but the both seemed so…I don’t know…unsupportive? They both seemed to pour all their energy into the wrong places, and despite saying that they had loved each other and wanted to make things work, every action that they took showed the opposite.

Like why...why would you think not telling your wife about your
semi-adopted child was the best way to go?

I understand that they were run down and emotionally exhausted early, but their steadfast desire to just NOT communicate with each other felt so very, very stupid, and it was incomprehensible that either of them thought that was the best way forward. It was a little exhausting learning their history and finding out that literally all their problems stemmed from them just not talking to each other. Perhaps this wouldn’t have seemed so annoying if it had just been between the two of them, but the way they responded to the issues in their marriage was directly detrimental to their children- Ji Woo basically never saw his father growing up (because he was off raising some other kid that he had taken responsibly for), Eun Joo believed her parents hated her after Jin Sook took her away from home for days and seemly tried to poison her, and Eun Hee was left stuck in the middle trying to hold together a family that was so obviously falling apart. While it was cute to see Sang Shik and Jin Sook start to rebuild their relationship, I just didn’t feel super emotionally connected to them. Despite them suffering and sacrificing for their children, they still just came across as incredibly selfish people, and it almost felt like they were sabotaging their relationship and were just too self-focused to notice.

It's almost like they were trying to misunderstand each other

I especially hated the way Jin Sook just took off at the end. While I 100% agree that mothers deserve to step away and get time for themselves, I just couldn’t get onboard with Jin Sook blaming her children for her emotional distress (when so much of that was her own fault for not communicating with her husband), and blaming them for putting HER through so much stress- seemingly completely oblivious to all the hurt and turmoil she had put her own children through by having a pretty crummy relationship modelled to them,

Maybe try TALKING to your family once in a while

being simmeringly hostile towards her husband for much of her children’s lives, and then dropping the bombshell on these kids that she wanted to leave their Dad. The way it played out was just tooooo selfish and short-sighted for me to sympathise with- particularly when you add in that she went no contact with her kids during her time away. If my Mum went no contact with me for a whole bloody year you can bet that I’d be no contact with her when she got back. Like, I get that Jin Sook needed her space to find herself and whatnot, but I don’t think a few ‘I am going well, hope you are all fine’ text messages would have prevented that. While the children were all learning about themselves and about each other (yes, even coming to understandings about their parents and their situations) Sang Shik and Jin Sook seemed to only be learning about each other and all the miscommunications they had. Even as Eun Joo was getting divorced I never really felt either of her parents could step outside their own selves to try and understand her and comfort her. Jin Sook’s reaction was literally ‘Eun Joo, did you really hate your family?’ as she cries- ah yes, so selfless during her child’s crisis. While Shang Shik and Jin Sook were both interesting and engaging characters, I just didn’t like them the way I liked Eun Joo, Eun Hee and Ji Woo.

Recommend? Sure- especially if you liked dramas such as ‘Age of Youth’, ‘Because This Life is My First’, or even ‘Angry Mom’. It has a similar pacing and vibe, and if you enjoy slower paced dramas with less action, this would be a great watch for you.

Interesting characters sure do make for a great show